The God of Destruction

So I just spent like a half an hour trying to remember how to log into this damn blog... I'm so horrible about these things. I've probably got four thousand profiles I don't remember how to log into cluttering up cyberspace. Oh well, I guess it's expendable, right? It's not like I have to feel like shit when I get junk mail, because it's not responsible for the massive destruction of the forests... I don't have to recycle spam, I just have to click "delete" and the very substance of its entire existence becomes obsolete. I become totally responsible for taking something out of existence completely.
I become the God of Spam Destruction.
You know, until the same bullshit ad pops up a week later in a different format.
But besides that, who cares? You're the god! You can remove it totally! Just like if I were to decide this blog was no longer worthy of your pretty little eyes... I could delete it. And you would have no chance at ever seeing these words again for as long as you live unless you decided beforehand that it's important enough to save separately and print, which none of you are pathetically in love with me enough to do- in fact, I don't have any readers as far as I know so who am I to say that anybody but myself will EVER read these things? If I wanted to cop out and go "Myspace Blog," I could and I know I'd have a bunch of people interested, but I'm not looking for that... I guess I want somewhere unbiased to vent. And what's the point of publicly writing something semi-personal or "too serious" when you know exactly what kind of reaction you're going to get? That doesn't strike me as an activity worth my time any more. I guess I just don't care anymore about who thinks what, and I need something to do to keep me busy and balanced and a little alone with the off chance of attracting someone's attention. I really couldn't give less of a fuck who I attract, because all the best things seem to happen accidentally and I don't have room in my mind for people I don't care about...
I'm so positive.
Anyway, I got pissed off today because I was trying to edit my profile on afterellen.com and when I tried to hit submit to save the changes, it took me to this page that said "access denied" and I couldn't do anything about it. And stupid me forgot to save what all I wrote even though the same thing happened yesterday!
Jesus Christ.
The dog just chewed up the inside sleeve of my coat.
This is really turning out to be my day.
Or night.
Or something.
God I'm bored.